11, 12 and down we delve

Sorry to my lovely followers but you can expect to have some rants about nothing important over the next couple of days. They will be all music and finding the meaning of life kind of topics so feel free to ignore them.

I think I should be crying but I haven't cried since I was 6, I've been to 11 funerals but no matter how close or far away a person is to me I never seem to cry or feel sad. Maybe I'm not capable of being sad anymore and it just builds up into a rant on this blog who knows? I get angry easily maybe it's because I'm a teenager, people are always asking if I'm depressed but I can assure everyone I'm not. I just have an unnatural obsession with avoiding people, watching anime, listening to music and reading books while trying to keep away from social contact. I could be a sociopath but I still feel guilt so I don't think that's the case. I was starting to feel excited as well about a holiday and now everyone expects me to just break down and bawl my eyes out. I'm not that kind of person, when I react to these events I become productive, I learnt German over the last few times it happened. A simple deviation in my otherwise unmotivated life.

'I need another story, 

something to get off my chest. 

My life gets kind of boring 

I need something to confess.'

Secrets by One Republic